Greetings! I felt it was time to write another blog. There’s so much to say and yet so little. This week in particular has been extremely heavy and dense energy wise. It’s been like hiking up a mountain through thick fog with a migraine! Of course there has been a number of solar flares this week which have the ability to affect the Earth’s electromagnetic fields as well as ours. I can now feel immediately when a solar flare from the sun is released and tend to check out a website to prove I’m not going crazy after all!
As part of the divine plan, solar flares are released to help us move stuck energy from our being so we can vibrate on a higher frequency. This means we can feel all types of emotion, body aches, flu-like symptoms, exhaustion and sometimes for no particular reason we can ‘think’ of. In my experience the best way to deal with this is to just accept it and welcome it, stay in the moment, concentrate on things you like doing and do them, rest when you can, laugh and/or watch comedy, eat healthy whole foods, drink plenty of pure water and be grateful for all the awesome things in your present life.
As we move closer and closer to the end of the Mayan Calender on 28th October 2011, we can expect to feel good times and what may feel like not such good times on a polarized level. The first five days of September were dense as well, the second five days light and fluffy and somewhat magical and now I feel the energy is shifting from dense to light once again. It’s like the flares come in and vacuum clean our souls, gathering all the pieces of dust here and there, clogs of hair, the odd clothes peg, and what the heck is that? Oh, just the usual pieces of corn and carrot! The thing is we have many levels of dust and dirt in our souls and we are really getting into the corners of the basement now, cobwebs and all. The cleansing (vacuuming) process can be tough but once one level is clean the light shines on in for a while until your soul is ready for more housekeeping. Eventually our souls will be sparkling clean and the dust and dirt will never return. Hoorah, we will shine like diamonds!
It certainly feels like a time of just being. Being in the now, not focusing on the past or future, making plans but not attaching through our egos like we used to, surrendering and allowing the energy to flow through us and create our new reality. It’s a time to stay out of fear and worry as much as possible and find ways of doing this, perhaps through meditation, prayer, writing, therapy, art, music, dance, cooking, exercise or heading into nature. Our thoughts are more powerful than ever before and we can easily manifest through positive or negative thoughts. Have you noticed how many more coincidences are occurring in your everyday life just because of a thought you have had? Have you noticed how much of the old you or old life you used to have or even wish for no longer exists? That you are such a different person to how you were at the beginning of this year? Do you sometimes look in the mirror and wonder who is staring back at you? The plans you had for this year, when you made the new year’s wish list may have no relevance at all now. Or, alternately, may have happened but in a completely different manner to what you had ‘planned’. If we have had no drastic changes in our life, then we would at least have had an emotional clearing out whereby we feel differently to how we used to, and hopefully in a positive way. Our souls are running the show now and our egos are taking a back seat – finally!
More than ever there is a division between people who are choosing to ascend and those who are choosing not to right now. We all have free will and freedom of choice through our ego (mind) despite our soul’s original plan or intention. The people in my life who are choosing not to ascend and to stay in polarized thinking, living in fear and allowing themselves to be controlled by the old thought forms, systems or people in their lives have simply disappeared from my life. This may mean we do not contact each other, or when we try to the phone cuts out or there’s a communication breakdown of some kind. This is because of a mismatch in frequency. You attract love and light more and more when you choose to ascend and when you lower your frequency by partaking in ego based polarized relationships, discussions, thoughts and judgement or criticism of others it will make you feel off balance and you will actually feel like cr&p.
It may be hard to leave those you love behind, but know they will be okay and at some point in their soul’s evolution they will ascend. Send them love, compassion and choose not to judge their free will. In some cases their soul’s plan is not to ascend now, so they are honouring what is right for them in this life time as their souls wish to continue to experience polarity.
When you ascend it simply means you hit a different frequency which is often called zero point. This is when the divine feminine and the divine masculine is perfectly balanced in your soul and you have reached a level of unity consciousness and connection with source. This is also known as reaching a level of ‘Christ Consciousness’ where all the ascended female and male masters we have come to know and love, including Christ himself, exist and vibrate with their loving energy and guidance. Click the tab at the top of this page for more information about ascension should you be interested.
As a token of appreciation to my fellow soul buddies and readers, I’m offering a remedy called ‘SOUL’. This is a blend of twelve New Zealand native plants, flowers, trees and seeds to assist in balancing the twelve chakras to move that housekeeping along and assist in reaching ascension or zero point on 11.11.11 – love, peace and unity consciousness – right on! This remedy was developed along with my amazing twin soul, so it’s a truly beautiful potion and I’ve had much positive feedback about it.
The remedy will be offered through an energy exchange via donation and the money will go towards distributing the ‘Aroha’ remedy to women’s refuges which I wrote about in my previous blog. As a guide, the postage and packaging for NZ folks is $5 and overseas peeps $10.
You can go to my donation page under ‘store’ at the top of this page to donate and email me your postal address to: email@example.com and I will send ‘Soul’ to your soul.
Thanks for sharing this wonderful journey. Until next time,
Love and light,
Hello and a warm welcome to my first ‘official’ blog. I’m glad you are here.
Over the past several years we have been going through a deep cleansing of our lives which has manifested in various emotional and physical symptoms, constant exhaustion and changes in our personal lives. This has been mirrored in changes on a global level as the earth also shifts and cleanses herself. Once we clear all this ‘stuff’ and heaviness we will realise our true soul’s potential and be able to act upon it, which will contribute towards humanity’s shift from polarised thinking to a unified consciousness. For many, this process is known as Ascension.
June’s energy and the eclipses within the month brought many seeds of change to all of us. Some of these changes may have manifested in different thought forms or finding that what we thought we once wanted, we no longer want. Our old life and ways of being and thinking may no longer feel right, make us joyful or even serve us. With these changes of thoughts and emotions, July has seen many of us revisiting recurring fears, old patterns of behaviour and events, and people from our past. Even though we had thought we had dealt with whatever is reappearing, obviously we haven’t. The past is coming back for healing and releasing of these old ways for once and for all. This may be difficult for us as we do not wish to feel a certain way, have a certain person in our life, or revisit events from the past which were hurtful or difficult. But we must in order to be free at last from whatever we are re-examining. This may take courage, communication and truth, but most of all it takes love.
In the past month or so a topic has been constantly streaming through and reappearing in my life . I guess it began when a friend asked if I could make up a special native essence remedy for the Women’s Refuge which will be called ‘Aroha’. The light translation of Aroha is love, however it may also be described as the binding force of all that is. With regard to this remedy, it refers to a deep love, and compassion for, and connection to, self. It has been designed to assist women who have been exposed to physical, sexual and/or emotional abuse. It’s purpose is to support these women and to assist in giving them the courage to take the steps necessary to carve out a new path for themselves and, in many cases their children, by subtly adjusting their energetic frequency. (You can read more about how native essences work by clicking the tab at the top of the page.)
Since making the components for this remedy, emotional abuse (psychological abuse) has factored once again strongly in my life. As a child, I was raised against the backdrop of emotional and physical abuse, and as an adult I have experienced emotional abuse in a key love relationship. It wasn’t until the relationship ended that I even realised I had been emotionally abused and several of my friends were honest enough to actually tell me how obvious the emotional abuse had been to them, or at least mention they didn’t feel things were quite as they seemed. One particular friend had hinted their feelings to me during the relationship itself, however at that time I wasn’t fully yet able to see it, let alone admit it to myself. I wasn’t ready to be alone and carve out a new life for myself. To live my life in the manner I wished to and not live the life of someone else. That’s what it felt like at the time. I was living someone else’s life and pretending to everyone it was the life I had always wished for.
At the exact time I entered into this relationship I also began a new job. In this job I was emotionally abused for several years. Despite suffering health issues and severe anxiety which led to years of panic attacks, I never considered leaving the job. This was because my partner and I had purchased a home and we had a high mortgage. It was a home I didn’t feel ready to purchase and looking back I shouldn’t have, however I felt pressured into buying it despite the knowing in my heart I wasn’t even yet ready to live together, let alone buy a house together. During the three years in my job, never once did my partner suggest that I leave, even though I was also physically assaulted on the job and was fearing for my own safety.
Some of you reading this who know me may be surprised I didn’t leave my partner and job earlier. I may come across to many as a capable, strong and independent woman. Indeed I cannot even begin to imagine this happening to me again, because I now recognise the signs of emotional abuse. When I was faced with similar situations at a later time, I quickly left the person involved and a particular job. I have worked hard on dealing with the abuse from both my childhood and this key relationship since then, and had thought it was well behind me. In the last month though events in the lives of others have forced me to revisit it; several of my loved ones have suddenly come to the realisation themselves (or been forced to realise through external actions) that they are either the victim in an emotionally abusive relationship or actually the abuser.
Emotional abuse can be a subtle manipulation over a number of years but the early signs are often immediate. In most cases, although things may be troubling you within your relationship, you may not recognise you are being abused unless you understand the signs and symptoms. You may also put up a front to people you are close to, so they are unaware of the reality of your relationship.
I have listed some of the signs below. Some of you will already be aware of these signs having been involved in an emotionally abusive relationship in the past. Others may recognise these signs from your childhood, having played out in your parent’s relationship.
If you are currently involved in a relationship of this kind please seek help. This help can be found through a number of professional counselling services or, if you are reluctant to go down this route, at least be honest with yourself and confide in a close friend or family member who you trust and who may be able to help and advise you. Often those close to us do not realise it’s happening until you tell them. Sometimes we can know people for years and not realise they are being emotionally abused and controlled. Many people think because they are not being physically abused by their partner, they are not being abused. This may not be true. You may be in a relationship (or know someone who is) which is draining something from you. You may not have recognised that your partner has eroded your self-esteem and happiness.
Signs of emotional abuse include:
- You cannot feel you can always discuss with your partner what is bothering you. You hide your true feelings.
- Your partner frequently criticises you, humiliates or undermines your self-confidence, overtly or subtly.
- Other people tell you that you are talented and beautiful and have so much potential, but you feel your partner thinks the opposite.
- When you stand up for what you want or disagree with your partner, your partner ceases speaking to you for a number of days or even weeks.
- Your partner isolates you from friends (or family) and sometimes moves you to a new geographical location on their suggestion, where you feel you don’t have your own social group, so your dependence on them grows.
- Your partner is unsupportive when you want to try something new, for example, a new career, activity or creative endeavour. This may make you turn down potential opportunities before you even discuss them with your partner as you’re afraid what their reaction may be.
- Your partner controls the finances or limits your access to money, work or material resources.
- Your partner may not recognise or value the unpaid work you do around the home and does therefore not consider you to be an equal financial partner in the relationship and tells you so.
- Your relationship swings back and forth between being emotionally distant and very close.
- You sometimes feel obligated to have sex with your partner or engage in sexual activity just to avoid an argument, or you constantly feel you are being sexually rejected or there’s something wrong with you sexually.
- You sometimes feel trapped in the relationship.
- You are sometimes afraid of your partner or afraid of upsetting them.
- Your partner has asked or told you not to associate with a certain person or group or to stop an activity, job or hobby even though you don’t want to.
- You feel dependant on your partner and often feel powerless and sometimes depressed.
- Your partner uses the children in some way to control you. They may coerce you into having a child you are not ready for to keep you dependant on them, or they may refuse to have a child with you so they have you to themselves. They may control all the decisions about the children, they may be jealous of the time you spend with the children, not help enough with the children, blame you when the children misbehave, undermine you in front of the children, or continually criticise your parenting skills. The children become a point of conflict in some way.
- Your partner has made you change your behaviour. You behave in certain ways or say certain things to please your partner to meet their expectations of you.
- When you don’t want to do something, your partner puts forward a closed system of logic. Your partner gets their own way by sometimes wearing you down. What they want or says goes.
- Your partner was abused in some way as a child and has low self-esteem and doesn’t feel good enough in general.
- Your partner is often extremely jealous and controlling.
- Your partner has an explosive temper.
- Your partner likes you to be dependant upon him/her.
- Your partner doesn’t have many friends or has only superficial relationships with others. Their primary, if not exclusive relationship is with you.
- Your partner often blames you for the relationship difficulties and accuses you of nagging. Some partners refuse counselling as you are the one with the problem and not them.
- Your partner sometimes seems to have a dual personality. Charming and loving one day, cruel and selfish another.
- You sometimes feel like you are the trophy wife/husband/partner or a symbol and that your partner doesn’t relate to you as a person in your own right.
- Your partner may act a different way in company towards you, i.e. loving, helpful and charming, so friends and family have no idea of the abuse you are suffering.
Please remember that the abuser may not own or recognise that they are being abusive. They may never see or own the truth and in some cases they will accuse you of being an abuser and see themselves as a victim. In this case, if they are not prepared to get help, the best thing to do is to leave, heal yourself (and in some cases your children) and forgive them. Carving out your own path is your soul’s right.
If you are reading this and see signs that you yourself are emotionally abusing someone, please have the courage to seek professional help. We often have no idea of our behaviour until someone else points it out to us.
We all have the power to heal all aspects of our past and patterns of behaviour. Welcome all the new changes and revelations with positive energy, love and surrender. These are the keys to speeding up the process of healing.
The following link is to the site of Clare Murphy PHD. Clare’s site is an incredible resource about psychological abuse and includes a power and abuse wheel based on Clare’s research over several years. This wheel clearly identifies 16 patterns or tactics an abuser uses to maintain control over their partner.
In closing, I know my frequency attracted the experiences I had with various forms of abuse. Patterns of behaviour are learnt from an extremely young age and are often repeated through the course of our life because that is all we know.
I’m empowered and grateful for the experiences I’ve had and have much love and gratitude for the beautiful and generous people who entered into my life to help me heal from them.
Until next time,
Love and light,
Thanks to the following link for some of the above information on the signs of emotional abuse: http://www.lilaclane.com/relationships/emotional-abuse/